Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category

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A disease called perfection

September 28, 2009

I know full well that photography and other creative industries are extremely competitive. In fact, I am reminded of that every time I have to give a price estimate.  The law of Supply and Demand applies to photographers just the same that it applies to those who make widgets.  The more skilled you are, the higher your standards, the more you can charge, etc…  I think everyone understands that, yet, lately I’ve seen the inverse of this among self-proclaimed newbies and amateurs.

I had a conversation with an aspiring filmmaker who promised his crew that he would never make a film that wasn’t excellent.  Another guy recently asked me some pointed questions about how to maintain his “extremely high standard of quality.”  When I stop and think about it, I realize that I too was at one time guilty of this disease called “perfection.”

In our zeal to pursue something that is creative, fun, and challenging; many of us are too afraid to fail that we rob ourselves of opportunities to learn from our mistakes. Now that I look back at my own beginnings in photography I realize that I was doing myself a disservice.  Instead of taking risks and basking in the freedom to fail I too often played it safe, or worse, pretended to be a professional so that I could land a big client.

Why is it that we are always in a hurry to get somewhere?  As kids we can’t wait to grow up and drive the car, go to college, or get married.  As a young professional we spend so much time trying to prove ourselves to others.  I think we’d be much better off if we shed the burden of success and realized that failure is inevitable. If we viewed mistakes as a chance to learn something then we might actually make something truly excellent some day.

Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good enough!  Inspire others with the things you do now –not the things you’re going to perfect some day.  Try something creative and don’t worry about the results.  Just learn from the experience and enjoy the process! After all, that’s probably why you got into photography/music/art in the first place.

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Making a plan that’s destined to fail

July 9, 2009

I’ve spent the last two days deep in thought and prayer trying to figure out what I should be doing with my life. Here’s what I’ve learned.

1.) Seek God.

2.) and then… [everything else]

Really.  Honestly.  For the first time in my life I’ve come to the unshakable conclusion that living for Jesus is the only way to live.  I’m not sure I can explain it (though I’ll try in a minute) but it really feels like it’s the only logical conclusion one could possibly come to.

I don’t pretend to have it all figured out nor to have found some magical formula, but I hope that in sharing my thoughts someone else may stumble upon the same conviction that Christ really does care about our lives in such a deep, profound way.

The rabbit trail…

We all have dreams and desires, but personally, I don’t have a clue how mine will play out over the course of my life.  My Moleskine is littered with thoughts of this uncertainty, and lately it’s been keeping me up at night.  I finally took some time to dig in, and found myself wandering down the following rabbit trail:

  • Ask God to strengthen and sanctify your desires in accordance with their efficacy in glorifying Him.
  • Ask Him to realign your priorities.  We should be genuinely more interested in furthering His Kingdom rather than our own.
  • Pray about it more, and pray for others more.  Get your eyes off yourself; it does a body good.
  • Write out your desires.  What makes you tick?  What are you about?
  • Prioritize the following questions: Where? When? How? What? and Who?  I found the order of them to be somewhat important.  What should be the first question?  After each one, ask yourself “Why?”
  • Your effectiveness in the Kingdom is not about where you are or what you’re doing but rather how much you are willing to be used by God in your circumstances. (This was the first major turning point for me.)
  • How can you give more?  …of your money, time, energy, life.
  • Make a plan.  Until you have a plan, God cannot interrupt it. (Turning point number two.)
  • We have control over so little, yet we worry so much.  The best we can do is ask God to wreck our plans, to take over, invade our lives, and divert our path.
  • If we are truly following God then we have nothing to fear.
  • Devise a plan and then earnestly ask Him to save you from it.  After all, God has bigger things in store for you.
  • Don’t focus on the plan; don’t even focus on God’s will; focus on Christ.  The only reason you follow the plan is to give God an opportunity to overwhelm it.

In conclusion…

The problem is that I don’t know the future.  I don’t know what will come up in the next two years.  My best bet is to leave the future up to the One who controls it.  In the mean time, I’ll stick to my man made two-year plan.  If God doesn’t come through for me, then I know exactly where I’ll be.  It’s the most realistic yet challenging plan I could come up with, but something tells me I’ll be bored to tears if God actually lets it happen.

I realize that the thoughts written here are so abbreviated that they might not make any sense, but hopefully something will strike a chord with you next time you’re trying to make sense of your life.  Feel free to add your two cents or share your own experiences of how God has wrecked your plans for the better.

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of restlessness and priorities

July 6, 2009

Silence has a way of drawing things out of us.  Every night around 2:00 AM lately I’ve been restless.  It’s not that I can’t fall asleep or that I’m not tired, but rather that the quietness seems to stir something in me…

In my own experience, both God and creativity seem to thrive in these times of restlessness if only I will take the time to meditate on them.

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Painful Providence

June 17, 2009

My dad works as a tour guide and speaker here in D.C.  Last week he injured his back, and it rendered him immobile for a couple days.  During this time he reluctantly had to decline a couple tours.  Thankfully he’s feeling much better now and is out once again touring with a group of folks.

Well, today he met another tour guide and discovered that she was the substitute who took his place last week.  As it turns out, the group she substituted was in the Holocaust Museum while the shooting took place.  In other words, if my dad hadn’t injured his back he would have been in the museum when the shooting happened.

Makes you wonder how many “setbacks” have protected us from something else…

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University of Barnes and Noble

May 14, 2009

About seven years ago I enrolled myself in the University of Barnes and Noble (UBN). It’s not very well accredited, and the classes are incredibly small; but they have some of the best teachers in the world and it’s far cheaper than any other college you’ll find.  For two years that was how I studied and learned everything I know about photography, animation, and visual effects.

The next five years were spent building my business, and I’m pleased to announce that Mud Productions turned 5 years old last February.  Lately, however, I’ve been feeling like I need a sabbatical. I’ve lasted for five years on the knowledge I had when I began, but now I want to pour myself into books and learn as much as I can so that I can take my business and my talent to the next level.

I think these feelings are very common in any creative profession. We hit a glass ceiling; we can see where we want to be but often feel limited by our experience, money, or knowledge.  We fight these feelings until the busy season comes and we are inundated with work.  It pays the bills, and we are thankful for the opportunity to do creative work, but that longing to do more and greater things hasn’t gone away.

…and so the cycle continues.

Until we reach the point where we are motivated to make a change, we will keep getting what we’ve always gotten.

For me, that point came recently and I’ve decided to enroll in another semester at UBN.  I’ve narrowed my curriculum to three main topics: Finances, Photography, and Filmmaking.

Quite possibly the hardest thing about studying at UBN is that you will only get as far as your self-discipline will allow.  Just because I have decided to read some books doesn’t inherently mean that I will be a better photographer or businessman.  Knowledge is useless until you put it into action.

For the next few months you can expect to see a lot more book reviews posted here. In an effort to put my knowledge into action I will undertake a small project and post it online every time I finish a book (this will be easy for the photography books, but I will have to get creative with the financial ones!)

What about you?  What do you feel is holding you back from doing what you want to do?

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A Plea for Grattitude

May 6, 2009

Apparently there was a memo that went out saying that today was going to be a crappy day. At least, that’s the conclusion I’ve come to after reading the status updates from a handful of my friends.  Everybody seems to want the day to be over, and I cannot figure out why.

Honestly I’m a little fed up with all the negativity I keep hearing.

I understand that bad days happen.  Believe me… I know.  There is a time to mourn, and I respect that.  What I do not respect, however, is the needless complaining I hear day after day.  We Americans (Christians in particular) have so much to be thankful for, and I think it is a slap in the face of our Creator to ignore His blessings day after day as we wallow in our self-pity.

In these rough economic times I dare say everybody who is reading this can count a handful of friends or family members who don’t have jobs right now.  Yet, the complaining doesn’t seem to end.

There are two blind men who live in my apartment building.  Every time I see them I am reminded to thank God for giving me eyes that see –even if I need glasses with a strong prescription.

As best as I can tell you have two options: you can change your circumstances or you can change your attitude.

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People-Pleasers Beware

July 18, 2008

When was the last time you said “No” to someone?

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Due Credit

July 14, 2008

We’re just past the halfway mark for 2008 and already I’ve had such a full year. Business is going very well, and it’s not because of anything I’ve done. So far this year, all of my official attempts at marketing and advertising haven’t generated a dime of business, yet I’ve been busier than ever. People and opportunities seem to pop up from nowhere at precisely the right time. I can’t help but think it’s God’s way of reminding me that He’s in control.

I ran across a verse in Deuteronomy today. Chapter 8:11 paraphrased “When so many things in your life are going well—make sure you don’t become so full of yourself and your things that you forget God.” Verse 17 “If you start thinking to yourself, ‘I did all this. And all by myself. I’m rich. It’s all mine!’—well, think again. Remember that God, your God, gave you the strength to produce all this…”

I feel like I go through life without giving God the credit He deserves, so this is me giving Him some long overdue and sorely understated props!

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Convenience vs Community

May 20, 2008

Lately I’ve been looking for ways to make my business and lifestyle more efficient (when is that not the case??  Anyway…)  It seems that there are many things I do “just because that’s how I’ve always done them,” without really thinking of why.  So, I was churning these thoughts in my head today as I walked to the bank and the post office.

“Ya know, I could just use the ATM instead of going to Sidney (the teller guy, not the city  =)  On that note, I could set up an account with FedEx and avoid waiting in line at the Post Office too.  Surely that would help me save a few minutes next time.”  But then I thought about it a little more…

The more convenient and automated things become, the less human interaction there is.  Admittedly there are times when that’s a good thing; but the fact remains that the more touch screens, drop boxes, and websites I deal with, the less I get to know the people behind them.  There’s a sense of community when I joke around with Manny at the Post Office or Sidney at the bank.  It’s the human interaction and relationships we form that make our lives richer –not the speed at which we conduct business.

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A Lesson in Learning

February 23, 2008

“When one teaches, two learn.”  -Robert Heinlein

I’ve spent several hours today (and last Saturday) working on my upcoming “Creative Lighting” tutorial, and it has been a learning experience to say the least.  Putting my thoughts into a tutorial and attempting to explain what I am just learning myself has been extremely enlightening, and it has brought an even greater clarity to my understanding.  I’m convinced that one of the best ways to learn something is to teach it to someone else.

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Where are the forceful men?

December 13, 2007

Over the past several weeks I’ve received many emails about the movie “The Golden Compass.” Christian activists jumped all over this film and the books that preceded it. They warned of an overtly atheistic message, and they told families to stay far away from it this Christmas season.

So what did I do? I went to a matinée showing opening day.*

I first heard of this movie from a well-intended Christian organization, and immediately I felt like we’ve missed the point. Rather than providing a solution all I heard was them telling us that we should avoid the problem. “Let’s boycott it. That’ll show ‘em!” If that is our best defense then I suggest we go ahead and throw in the towel. We are inadvertently giving them the victory if we don’t even show up to fight.

If the Kingdom of God is “forcefully advancing” then we are lagging behind by choosing to hold our ground.

As for The Golden Compass, I say “Bring it on! Do your worst.” This sort of thing should cause us as Christians to rise to the challenge, not back away from it. Let’s turn our criticisms into creations, and show the world that God is the Author of creativity. Criticize by creating!

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Film for Thought

October 25, 2007

Last night I saw the film Into the Wild.  If you plan to see the movie, then I suggest you stop reading now. Though this is not a review of the film, it does give away a few details… Read the rest of this entry ?

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racing with horses

October 2, 2007

“To whom much is given, much is required.”

As Christians we are called to a higher standard. We have been given so much, but it’s so easy to lose sight of that and get wrapped up in our own trivial circumstances. When I start looking around and comparing myself to others it’s only a matter of time before I find myself exhausted, restless, and frustrated.

I’ll even rationalize my frustration with God. “If I’m supposed to live a life worthy of the calling I’ve received,” I tell Him, ” then why does it feel like it’s killing me?” There is a moment of silence, and God responds:

“If you have raced with men on foot and they have worn you out, how can you compete with horses?” -Jeremiah 12:5

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not-so-intellectual property

September 27, 2007

The very mention of the term “Intellectual Property” sends a red flag to my conscience. Not only is the term loaded with thoughts of lawsuits and entitlement, but it implies a skewed perception of value. There seems to be an implied belief that the result of one’s intellect is where the value lies. Nothing we create is intellectual in itself. Rather it is a manifestation of our intellect as an artist, architect, engineer, performer, fill-in-the-blank. If we place all the value on the creation, we undermine and undervalue the creator.

To make matters worse we waste time and money bickering over who owns rights to the piece of property. Debates and court cases over Intellectual Property only kill the creative fuel that spawns the Intellectual Property in the first place.

Don’t get me wrong, I fully believe an artist should be appropriately compensated and credited for his work. I also believe that people should be able to take an idea or “property” and capitalize on it; I’ll even go one step further and say that this often breeds creativity. However, if we think the solution is to silence the competition then we have surrendered our intellect to the highest bidder.

The true intellectual property is us! It’s a gift from God that sets us apart from the rest of His creation. It seems fitting that when we neglect that gift we get caught up in the details of creation.

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a different kind of mission(ary)

August 21, 2007

I’m becoming increasingly disturbed by the traditional sense of “missionaries,” “evangelists,” and our attempts at “reaching out to those in need.” It seems to me that whenever someone talks about “faith in action” and “the interplay of faith and life,” they are really saying we need to be feeding and serving the poor. Cue the mental commercial of African kids starving… Now, we simply cannot ignore God’s command to serve the poor, the fatherless, and the widow; but we are doing ourselves a disservice if we think it ends there.

I believe that “faith in action” has just as much to do with art as it does with serving the poor.

Every child of God is called to a life of missions; the Gospel of Christ compels us. Yet, we cannot overlook the unique gifts, talents, and strengths God has given us.  “Not everyone is called to go to Africa…”  Every church I’ve ever been to has said the same thing, and then in the very next breath they talk about ways to serve in the local church.  The point I’m trying to make is that unless we are steadfast and resolute in pursuing the mission that God Himself has placed inside of us, there will always be well-intended people who are eager to pull you into their mission.

We can do the right thing for the wrong reasons, but in the end we’re only hurting ourselves.

What is your mission field?  Find it.  Chase it.  Live it.

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the talent of discipline

June 27, 2007

It’s interesting the way we perceive “natural” talent. A good number of people have said that I’m talented, but I think it would be more accurate to say that I’m disciplined. Ya see, I spent two years in isolation (more or less) reading, studying, observing, and learning all I could about visual arts. It wasn’t glamorous. It wasn’t easy. It certainly wasn’t natural. There were days that were utterly frustrating, and for the most part it looked like anything other than talent. But now, on the other side of that, people see me as one of those guys who was just “born with it.”

It’s important that we don’t overlook the role of discipline when it comes to talent. It’s all too easy to shrug off talent as something that was inherited at conception, but this undermines the value of our hard work or God-given gifts.

The bridge to Talent is called Discipline. Those who dare to cross it have earned my respect.

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the thinking God

June 4, 2007

As I was reading my Bible* the other night I came across something so simple, yet so profound. When God was delivering the Israelites from Egypt it says, “God didn’t lead them by the road through the land of the Philistines, which was the shortest route, for God thought, ‘If the people encounter war, they’ll change their minds and go back to Egypt’.” Above all else, two words stood out to me: God thought.

For some reason, I’ve never thought of God as a “thinking” being. Sure, I know Him as a “knowing” God –omniscient even– but the idea of Him really thinking in the present tense is a concept I haven’t considered before. How does someone who is infinite in knowledge and time have logical, rational thought patterns? I don’t know, but what I do know is that I closed my Bible thinking, “That’s a God I can relate to.”

*The Message translation.

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the frustrated God

June 3, 2007

Even God was ready to give up on His creation:

God saw that human evil was out of control. People thought evil, imagined evil—evil, evil, evil from morning to night. God said, “I’ll get rid of my ruined creation, make a clean sweep: people, animals, snakes and bugs, birds—the works. I’m sorry I made them.”

Does that defy His character? I’ve never heard a sermon abut the spirituality of frustration, nor do I have the answer. Every artist has experienced it –the urge to rip up the canvas, throw away the film, smash the sculpture. Even God wrestled with it. It’s somehow encouraging and yet simultaneously discouraging to think of that. I feel frustrated often, but I certainly don’t feel closer to God during those times.

I picture God as an artist stepping back from His canvas. A sigh of frustration muffles through the air, and He shakes His head slowly. “It was supposed to be so much better than this…”

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everything in its place

May 3, 2007

In the account of creation God didn’t create something until He first prepared a place for it.  He created the ocean before He made fish to dwell in it.  He scattered the land with fruit-bearing plants before creating the animals who would eat it.  He established the rhythm of day and night before telling man to rest.

I think there is an important truth here that is often overlooked.  God doesn’t bring us into something until He has prepared us for it, and until He has prepared the place for us.  That was true of God’s character at the beginning of time and it’s still true today.

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Creativity and the Bible

April 29, 2007

One of the most disappointing books I’ve read is about “Christ and Creativity.” Part of my disappointment comes from the fact that this is a topic of tremendous significance to me, so anything less than earth-shaking is prone to be a let down for me. However, the author takes far too much liberty in stretching various stories in the Bible to explain them as an act of creativity. I think the fundamental flaw with this approach is that we are looking in the wrong place entirely.

Search the Bible (NIV and King James at least) and you will not find a single appearance of the word “creativity.” Not once. That should tell us something about our Creator. He never intended for us to merely read about creativity, He wants us to experience it.

“The invisible things of God are clearly seen through His creation.” -Romans 1:20.

Look through a microscope, study how the human eye works, light a fire, observe the motion of animals –everywhere you look, creation is shouting in every language that God is the author of creativity. He wrote the book on it by not writing a single word about it.

I wonder how many other areas God is saying to us, “You won’t find the answers here. Stop trying to figure everything out. Just go! Live! Experience! There you will find Me…”