but my lips hurt real bad!

Never in my life have I finished a tube of chapstick. Never.

To be honest, I’m not a huge fan of the little, paste-filled cylinder in the first place. While I don’t abhor it nearly as much as lotion, the concept is the same: I’d rather endure a mild burning sensation than feeling greasy and sticky all day. But alas! I was not endowed with an eternal supply of lip moisturizing glands,and so I must give in to the tiny tube every so often. It is with this “Use only when absolutely necessary” approach, that allows me to make a single tube of chapstick last for years. This means I’ve got years of opportunities to forget where I placed it, or have someone else take it by accident.

It occurred to me recently, “Man, I’ve been working on this stick of Burt’s Beeswax for quite some time now. Maybe I’ll finally end the cycle and finish the stick!” Then, only a few days later my sister-in-law was in desperate need of chapstick and so I offered mine. The next day, as a way ofshowing her appreciation, she bought me a new stick of chapstick and simultaneously kept order and balance in the universe of Stephen Elliot.

Some things never change.

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